Sexual Intimacy and Marriage
Sexual Intimacy and Marriage
Intro questions – the morality of pedophilia, rape, and homosexuality
Basic question that we will refer to – What is sex for? What is morally wrong with some sexual encounters and not others? If it is ok to have sex within a marriage why is it immoral to have sex outside of one? Why is marriage moral?
“Consensual sex is noncoercive. Imposing our sexual desires on others without their consent is an affront to the other’s dignity. It is for this reason that adults having sex with children is considered immoral.” (360-361)
This goes for rape as well. Is consent all that is required for a sex act to be morally permissible?
Read silly intro from page 349 Under what conditions does this become an immoral act?
The Religious Answer
“Sexuality has traditionally been regarded as a necessary but dangerous force that needs to be kept under control by laws and prohibitions. Jewish, Christian, and Islamic attitudes toward sexuality have been shaped by teachings in the Bible and Koran which regard marriage as the only proper setting for sexual intimacy and which condemn adultery and fornication as well as homosexual elations. Sex outside of heterosexual marriage is considered wrong because it is in conflict with God’s natural law.”(349)
Sex is for procreation – any other use of sex is a sin.
Sex is associated with sin – therefore a chaste, unmarried life is held up as an ideal in the Catholic Church. As is seen in the enforced celibacy for its priests.
The Feminist Answer
The establishment of marriage is a sham meant to regulate women to an inferior role
Because of statements like this: “woman has her substantial destiny in the family.” (Hegel, 356) This means that the wife cedes her power and rule to the husband because she is naturally inferior. This is a problematic claim for a feminist.
Wollstonecraft – Marriage should not include any subordination but should be a “friendship of equals” (356)
Is Love Neccesary for sex – mutual consent and dignity
Ruddick argues that sex is ‘morally preferable’ if it includes not only benefits for oneself but also for the other person. This is more likely to occur in a situation where there is love and care for the other individual, therefore sex is more moral in environments of a long term commitment - marriage
Is pleasure gained a legitimate reason to have sex? “We engage in other bodily activities with others (e.g., contact sports, massage, and surgery) because these activities bring us pleasure or profit without feeling we have to be in an intimate relationship with the other or affirm their moral worth.”(351)
Homosexuality – what is the argument for its immorality?
“In Iran more than three hundred people were executed between 1990-1996 for violation of laws prohibiting homosexuality.”(350)
“In a 2002 Gallup Poll over half of Americans agreed with the statement that “homosexual behavior is morally wrong” while only 38 percent considered it to be morally acceptable. However more recent 2004 polls show that Americans may be becoming more sympathetic toward the homosexual community.”(353-354)
“The belief that homosexuality is a deviation from the norm was reinforced by Sigmund Feud who wrote that homosexuality resulted from a boy’s inability to resolve his Oedipal conflict and sexual attraction to his mother. For many decades the mental health community accepted Freud’s definition of homosexuality as a perversion and mental disorder. The high prevalence of HIV/AIDS, which was first diagnosed in 1977 among homosexuals, fueled the public’s belief that homosexuality was inherently unhealthy and immoral. It wasn’t until 1994 that the AMA revoked the disease model and its position that medical professionals should aim at changing the sexual orientation of homosexuals.”(354)
Aquinas – Because sex is for the purpose of recreating, and homosexual relations do not produce children, therefore homosexual relations are a violation of God’s natural law.
Kant – Because there is no result, aka no children, homosexuality is wrong because you are using the other person for purely personal satisfaction.
Marriage – a two person social contract?
Ex. Friends
What makes us obligated to stay faithful in a marriage? Why is it moral to do so?
What is wrong with this kind of a union between people of the same sex?
“Same-sex marriage is legal in the Netherlands, Belgium, and Canada. In addition, homosexual couples have full legal rights in several European countries.”(354)
“The concept of moral goodness is linked to the well-being and dignity of our fellow human beings. Some philosophers argue that sex outside of heterosexual marriage violates respect for human dignity since it entails using the other merely as an object or tool for one’s pleasure. Sex within a marriage, on the other hand, affirms the other’s worth and dignity. Goldman acknowledges that sexual acts involve the manipulation fo the other’s body for one’s own pleasure. However, he also believes that sex is morally permissible if you make sure you provide sexual pleasure to your partner…Sex within a marriage does not always meet this qualification, while sex outside of marriage may.”(360)
Cohabitation
“They maintain that premarital chastity is the best way to guarantee marital commitment and faithfulness. Indeed, couples who cohabitate before marriage have a significantly higher divorce rate and rate their marriages less positively than couples who did not cohabitate before marriage.”(355)
“Two of the primary reason for cohabitation are readily available sex and convenience.”(355)
Do people who cohabitate make a similar social contract commitment as that of married people?
Discussion Questions:
What is guilt? Where do we get it and why do we have it?
Love is supposed to be a pre-requisite for marriage and hence a pre-requisite for moral sex. Why is it more moral to have sex with someone you love?
Ex. Kids driving forklifts – unequal treatment must be based on morally relevant differences between two groups. What is the basis for the unequal treatment given to homosexual couples?
Homosexuality is found cross-culturally, across the history of humanity, and in animals. “In this sense homosexuality is no more a sickness than is having dark skin or being female”(362) What is fundamentally wrong with calling homosexuality unnatural?
Intro questions – the morality of pedophilia, rape, and homosexuality
Basic question that we will refer to – What is sex for? What is morally wrong with some sexual encounters and not others? If it is ok to have sex within a marriage why is it immoral to have sex outside of one? Why is marriage moral?
“Consensual sex is noncoercive. Imposing our sexual desires on others without their consent is an affront to the other’s dignity. It is for this reason that adults having sex with children is considered immoral.” (360-361)
This goes for rape as well. Is consent all that is required for a sex act to be morally permissible?
Read silly intro from page 349 Under what conditions does this become an immoral act?
The Religious Answer
“Sexuality has traditionally been regarded as a necessary but dangerous force that needs to be kept under control by laws and prohibitions. Jewish, Christian, and Islamic attitudes toward sexuality have been shaped by teachings in the Bible and Koran which regard marriage as the only proper setting for sexual intimacy and which condemn adultery and fornication as well as homosexual elations. Sex outside of heterosexual marriage is considered wrong because it is in conflict with God’s natural law.”(349)
Sex is for procreation – any other use of sex is a sin.
Sex is associated with sin – therefore a chaste, unmarried life is held up as an ideal in the Catholic Church. As is seen in the enforced celibacy for its priests.
The Feminist Answer
The establishment of marriage is a sham meant to regulate women to an inferior role
Because of statements like this: “woman has her substantial destiny in the family.” (Hegel, 356) This means that the wife cedes her power and rule to the husband because she is naturally inferior. This is a problematic claim for a feminist.
Wollstonecraft – Marriage should not include any subordination but should be a “friendship of equals” (356)
Is Love Neccesary for sex – mutual consent and dignity
Ruddick argues that sex is ‘morally preferable’ if it includes not only benefits for oneself but also for the other person. This is more likely to occur in a situation where there is love and care for the other individual, therefore sex is more moral in environments of a long term commitment - marriage
Is pleasure gained a legitimate reason to have sex? “We engage in other bodily activities with others (e.g., contact sports, massage, and surgery) because these activities bring us pleasure or profit without feeling we have to be in an intimate relationship with the other or affirm their moral worth.”(351)
Homosexuality – what is the argument for its immorality?
“In Iran more than three hundred people were executed between 1990-1996 for violation of laws prohibiting homosexuality.”(350)
“In a 2002 Gallup Poll over half of Americans agreed with the statement that “homosexual behavior is morally wrong” while only 38 percent considered it to be morally acceptable. However more recent 2004 polls show that Americans may be becoming more sympathetic toward the homosexual community.”(353-354)
“The belief that homosexuality is a deviation from the norm was reinforced by Sigmund Feud who wrote that homosexuality resulted from a boy’s inability to resolve his Oedipal conflict and sexual attraction to his mother. For many decades the mental health community accepted Freud’s definition of homosexuality as a perversion and mental disorder. The high prevalence of HIV/AIDS, which was first diagnosed in 1977 among homosexuals, fueled the public’s belief that homosexuality was inherently unhealthy and immoral. It wasn’t until 1994 that the AMA revoked the disease model and its position that medical professionals should aim at changing the sexual orientation of homosexuals.”(354)
Aquinas – Because sex is for the purpose of recreating, and homosexual relations do not produce children, therefore homosexual relations are a violation of God’s natural law.
Kant – Because there is no result, aka no children, homosexuality is wrong because you are using the other person for purely personal satisfaction.
Marriage – a two person social contract?
Ex. Friends
What makes us obligated to stay faithful in a marriage? Why is it moral to do so?
What is wrong with this kind of a union between people of the same sex?
“Same-sex marriage is legal in the Netherlands, Belgium, and Canada. In addition, homosexual couples have full legal rights in several European countries.”(354)
“The concept of moral goodness is linked to the well-being and dignity of our fellow human beings. Some philosophers argue that sex outside of heterosexual marriage violates respect for human dignity since it entails using the other merely as an object or tool for one’s pleasure. Sex within a marriage, on the other hand, affirms the other’s worth and dignity. Goldman acknowledges that sexual acts involve the manipulation fo the other’s body for one’s own pleasure. However, he also believes that sex is morally permissible if you make sure you provide sexual pleasure to your partner…Sex within a marriage does not always meet this qualification, while sex outside of marriage may.”(360)
Cohabitation
“They maintain that premarital chastity is the best way to guarantee marital commitment and faithfulness. Indeed, couples who cohabitate before marriage have a significantly higher divorce rate and rate their marriages less positively than couples who did not cohabitate before marriage.”(355)
“Two of the primary reason for cohabitation are readily available sex and convenience.”(355)
Do people who cohabitate make a similar social contract commitment as that of married people?
Discussion Questions:
What is guilt? Where do we get it and why do we have it?
Love is supposed to be a pre-requisite for marriage and hence a pre-requisite for moral sex. Why is it more moral to have sex with someone you love?
Ex. Kids driving forklifts – unequal treatment must be based on morally relevant differences between two groups. What is the basis for the unequal treatment given to homosexual couples?
Homosexuality is found cross-culturally, across the history of humanity, and in animals. “In this sense homosexuality is no more a sickness than is having dark skin or being female”(362) What is fundamentally wrong with calling homosexuality unnatural?
posted by Charles Carlson at
10:45 AM
